Cat is fascinated with all things adult. She quizzes me about movies rated PG-13 or R. She longs to ride in the front passenger seat of my car. She peppers me with questions about God, sex, cancer, death, my past boyfriends, divorce, politics and the environment (all of which she covered on a 30 minute ride to my office this weekend).
Hence Cat was triumphant and gleeful today to return from school to find a letter addressed to her. It was not just any letter; it was a bill for renewing her National Geographic Kids magazine.
“MOM MOM MOM MOM” she yelled, “I GOT MY FIRST BILL. I GOT MY VERY FIRST BILL. HOW COOL.” She was literally skipping a victory lap around the room waving the bill like one of Willie Wonka’s golden tickets.
“How do you plan to pay for this bill?” I inquired.
“Well, I could raid my piggy bank, but you said that is money for important things, so I think I will just use your money instead.”
At bedtime, I found her piggy bank gutted with its monetary entrails spilled on her desk. The exact cost of the subscription was set in a neat pile to one side.
“I thought you planned to use my money for your bill,” I said to Cat. “I told you I would pay for it.”
“But Mom,” she explained patiently, “My magazine is EDUCATIONAL and you said there is nothing more important than education so I am going to pay my bill and use my magazine to get smarter so I can earn more money.”
Game, set, match to America’s newest bill payer.